My diet has been a big topic of discussion among my friends lately. When I say discussion, I actually mean there is just a general consensus that my diet can’t get any worse because it is already at rock bottom. I’m a glass half full kind of guy so all I know is that I can only get better from here. I don’t know how I got here, but the first step is admitting to a problem so at least I’ve done that.

Generally I’m good for about 1500 calories a day, even though my friends might say it’s more like 1250. Oftentimes these calories come from the result of two meals usually around noon and five. Lunch comes in the form of the sandwich flavor of the week, currently bologna and cheese, and if I have to eat many more I’m going to throw up. This is usually augmented by some sort of granola bar, maybe a piece or two of fruit, as well as a mini candy bar. This is a far cry from what my mother used to pack for me in high school, but it’s what I have. Dinner, if I’ve been shopping and cooking, often consists of meat and potatoes. Chicken and potatoes, cheeseburger and potatoes, potatoes and potatoes. But lately, I haven’t been shopping, and when you don’t shop you can’t cook. So what have I been eating? The sandwich of the week! Just writing ‘bologna and cheese’ is making me sick, but I guess sustenance is a basic necessity of life. Sometimes I’ll eat three meals a day by including eggs for breakfast. And occasionally I will eat only one meal a day. This is half of a Little Caesar’s pizza around three o’clock when it’s too late for lunch, but I’m too hungry to wait for dinner.

If you know the first thing about nutrition you know that my friends’ estimation of my calories is much closer to correct than my estimate is. What’s my problem? I don’t know. Do I like food? Sure, I love it, I even think I have a pretty good palate as well. Am I a bad cook? Nope, while I’m not the greatest, I have been making the same meals going on three years now, so not only do I think I’ve perfected them, but I have also been eating the same meals for going on three years and haven’t become entirely sick of them yet, so they must not be that bad. Do I hate grocery shopping? Well yeah, but so does everyone. Nobody enjoys dropping fifty bucks on food every week. This leads me to my alternative theories. My body is simply training itself in the event of a disaster. Sure there are doomsday preppers, but these people are drastically underestimating their caloric intake, especially when there is nothing to do but eat. Subconsciously my body is pushing the limits of what it can take, less and less calories just in case one day I can only consume 500 in a day. My other theory is that growing up with an older brother I was always submitting to him. John and I both want seconds? He’s bigger, he’s older, he needs more. I like to think that both of these might be correct, but maybe I just need to eat on a regular schedule like the rest of the population.