I was born to a single mother who made only slightly above minimum wage, so, to say the least, I grew up poor. As a result of this, many things in my future appeared bleak. I was an average student at most, and I didn’t expect to receive any scholarships to help support me through college. I honestly didn’t know much about financial aid in high school, so I wasn’t anticipating that I’d come to be supported fully by a Pell Grant and student loans.

After filling out my first Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA), I received a -1500 Student Aid Index (SAI) score. This meant that my parents weren’t expected to contribute anything to my college fund and that I have, in general, higher financial needs. This allowed me to qualify for maximum Pell Grants, which remains my SAI score today.

I’m very grateful to be able to afford to go to college with the help of financial aid. However, I can’t help but be irked by how some of my peers described my situation. I’d often be told that I was “lucky” by my friends for having such a low SAI score. I understand a lot of my peers cannot afford college on their own and would benefit from having more financial aid, but there’s a reason I’m receiving a whole bunch, and it’s not because I am “lucky.” Without full financial aid coverage, I wouldn’t even be able to dream of going to college. Any money I earn goes straight to keeping myself alive. It would be beyond difficult to add tuition concerns to my financial stress. In fact, I’d consider those with the ability to give Grand Valley State University any of their own money to be lucky.

I hear arguments that many students are in a similar situation but work hard to pay their tuition, in which case I applaud them for their immense dedication and effort. However, everyone’s circumstances are different. Being labeled as “lucky” simply because I grew up so poor my family couldn’t always pay rent, have a working vehicle or have adequate food on the table is almost ironic. To me, my low SAI score is a reflection of the life I have lived so far, which was filled with grief, temporary homelessness and food insecurity.

This is not to say that I am without gratitude for my ability to attend university. However, I often feel that some of my peers just simply can’t grasp the weight of knowing I am in college because I am fully reliant on financial aid. When stating that I’m poor, I often receive “me too” in response, yet when I say I’m heading to the University’s food pantry, I receive judgment. 

I feel the issue here is not my peers purposefully trying to offend me, but more of a lack in understanding of the reality those with extreme financial disadvantage face.

I think many people find it hard to understand that being poor isn’t just the baseline “living off ramen noodles” stereotype for college students. Some of us have been homeless or without other basic needs. Not everyone who wants to be educated comes from a stable environment. In fact, a lot of us are going to college to better our situation. I know my main reason for attending university is to be better financially than my mother and provide a stable income for myself and anyone I’ll take care of in the future. While I consider myself grateful for the opportunity to attend college, I would not consider myself to be a lucky lottery winner, as some of my peers would portray.