Earlier this month, I was attacked in the head by a bird. I’ll give you a minute to stop laughing and collect yourself. Yes, red-winged blackbirds have taken over West Campus Drive and no one is safe. People may be shocked to know that Grand...

As Americans, there are two things we treasure above all else: deep fryers and freedom. Considering the obesity epidemic, I think don’t think anyone’s going to forget about deep fryers anytime soon. But freedom might be another story… We’re...

Dear Freshmen who have just become Sophomores (or … possibly still Freshmen), So? How was it? Was your first year everything you wanted, and more? Less? Are you excited it’s summer vacation? Did the anticipation of exams cause you to hate...

When I first heard the news about Osama Bin Laden, I felt relieved. It was as if, for the first time since Sept. 11, 2001, America could sit back on the couch, put her feet up, and just breathe. We had finally done what we set out to do. But as images...

Dear Concerned Citizens of Allendale, We understand that Grand Valley State University throws the wildest and most rabid parties in the state, and likely the entire nation. The all-too-familiar sight of dumpster fires illuminating the night skies are...

Dear graduating students, I know things seem stressful right now, with graduation right around the corner like a knife-wielding psychopath. I also know that there are plenty of people out there who will be saying to you (if they haven’t already)...

Grand Valley, you do not know the struggle I went through to get you this column. I had my own personal “127 Hours” experience when I tried to retrieve a stuck candy bar from the vending machine and got my arm jammed in there. I was about...

As many of you likely noticed, yesterday was Wednesday, the 13th. And while there are no slasher movies based on a Wednesday (even though the adult entertainment industry has certainly capitalized on the phrase “hump day”), there is the...